Private Vows at Markree Castle / First Look, Best Locations & Planning Guide

Private Vows at Markree Castle

A Quiet Moment Before the Ceremony

A wedding day can be full of people, conversations, music and excitement. But sometimes, one of the most meaningful parts of the day happens when almost nobody else is there.

At a recent wedding at Markree Castle, I photographed a couple meeting privately in the Chapel before their ceremony. They began with a first look and, once that first wave of emotion had settled, stayed there together to exchange private vows.

It was simple, personal and completely theirs.

Private vows can give you the freedom to say things to each other that you may not want to share in front of a room full of guests. And when they are thoughtfully included in your wedding timeline, they can do something else too: create a little breathing space before the ceremony and even allow you to complete some of your photographs earlier, leaving more time to enjoy your guests later.

In this guide, I’ll share how private vows can work at Markree Castle, how to prepare for them, how they can be combined with a first look, and some of the locations around the castle that I would consider for this kind of moment.

A Moment Just for the Two of You

What Are Private Wedding Vows?

Private wedding vows are personal promises that a couple chooses to exchange away from their guests, either before or after the main wedding ceremony.

They do not have to replace the vows you exchange during your ceremony. Think of them as something separate: a few minutes where you can speak openly to the person you are marrying without thinking about an audience, a microphone or how your words might sound to everyone else.

For some couples, this means sharing memories, promises or feelings that are simply too personal to say in front of a room full of family and friends. For others, it is about slowing the wedding day down for a moment and having a conversation that belongs only to the two of them.

One of the most natural times to exchange private vows is immediately after a first look. You have already stepped away from everyone else, you have seen each other for the first time, and the initial rush of emotion has had a moment to settle.

But a first look is not essential. Private vows can happen at another quiet point in your wedding day, including after the ceremony or during a short portrait session. The important part is not when you do it. It is creating enough time and privacy for the moment to feel like your own.

More Than Words

Why Couples Choose to Exchange Their Vows Privately

For many couples, the appeal of private vows is not about doing something different. It is about creating a few minutes during the wedding day that do not belong to anyone else.

Standing in front of family and friends can make even the most personal words feel public. When you step away together, there is no audience to react, no pressure to make anyone laugh and no need to turn your promises into a performance.

You can simply speak to each other.

That privacy can make room for things that might feel too personal for the ceremony: memories from your relationship, gratitude, fears, hopes for the future or promises that only the person standing in front of you needs to understand.

Private vows can also change the rhythm of the wedding day. Instead of moving directly from preparations into the ceremony, you create a quiet point in between. A chance to see each other, slow down and remember what the day is actually about before everything begins moving again.

And they do not need to be perfect. You can laugh, lose your place, cry, pause or forget what you wanted to say. None of that makes the moment less meaningful. Often, those unscripted reactions are what make it feel most like you.

Before You Start Writing

How to Prepare Emotionally for Your Private Vows

Writing private vows can feel surprisingly difficult. You may know exactly how you feel about each other, but putting those feelings into words is something completely different.

Before you start writing, talk about what you both want the moment to feel like. You do not need to tell each other what you are going to say, but it helps to agree on the general tone and approximate length. One person preparing a deeply personal five-minute letter while the other has written three funny sentences can leave both of you feeling slightly unprepared.

Then forget about trying to write the perfect wedding vows. Start with your relationship instead.

Think about the ordinary things you love about your partner, the moments that changed your relationship, the difficult times you have come through together and the life you are looking forward to building. The most meaningful promises are often not the biggest ones. They are the ones connected to the life you actually share.

You might ask yourself:

• What do I love about this person in our ordinary everyday life?
• What moment in our story best represents who we are together?
• What do I want to thank them for that I do not say often enough?
• What do I want to promise them for our marriage, not just for our wedding day?
• What am I most excited about when I imagine our future together?

When you have written your vows, read them aloud at least once before the wedding. Words can feel very different when spoken rather than read silently. You may discover where you naturally want to pause, where a sentence feels too complicated, or where emotion makes it difficult to continue.

And if that emotion arrives on the wedding day, let it. You do not need to rush through tears, fill every silence or apologise for losing your place. Pause. Look at each other. Laugh if you need to. Start again if you need to.

Private vows do not have to impress anyone. There is no audience. They only have to mean something to the person standing in front of you.

One Small Detail That Makes a Difference

Leave Your Phones Behind

One thing I would recommend after recently photographing a private vow exchange at Markree Castle is very simple: bring your vows on paper rather than reading them from your phones.

This is not primarily about making the photographs look better. It is about removing one more distraction from a moment that deserves your full attention.

A handwritten letter, a printed page or a small vow book allows you to look up, pause and reconnect with each other naturally. There is no screen to unlock, no scrolling and no notification appearing at exactly the wrong moment.

It also gives your hands something simple and meaningful to hold. Years from now, that piece of paper or vow book can become a physical reminder of what you said to each other that day.

And yes, from a photographer’s perspective, paper also feels much more timeless in the photographs. But the real reason I recommend it is simpler: when the moment begins, the fewer things competing for your attention, the better.

A Real Wedding at Markree Castle

A Private Vow Exchange in the Markree Castle Chapel

One of the reasons I wanted to write this guide was a recent wedding I photographed at Markree Castle. It was the first time I had photographed a couple combining a first look and private vows in the Chapel in exactly this way, and it showed me how naturally the two moments can work together.

As the bride was finishing her preparations, I brought the groom into the Chapel and made sure everything was ready for their first look. A few minutes later, the bride made her way over to meet him.

They saw each other for the first time in the Chapel, without their wedding guests around them. After the first look, there was no need to rush anywhere. They stayed together in the same space and began reading their private vows to each other.

That transition felt completely natural. There was no need to create another moment or move them somewhere else. The excitement of seeing each other became something quieter and more personal as they started speaking.

Once the vows were finished, we had a short opportunity to take a few photographs of the two of them together before continuing with the rest of the pre-ceremony plan. Later, they still had their wedding ceremony as planned.

That is an important point: private vows do not need to replace your ceremony. They can simply become another layer of the day. One private moment for the two of you, followed later by the ceremony you share with everyone you invited.

Two Moments That Work Beautifully Together

Should You Combine Private Vows with a First Look?

You certainly do not have to. But if you are already considering a first look, exchanging your private vows immediately afterwards can be one of the most natural ways to include them in your wedding day.

A first look gives you a reason to step away from everyone else before the ceremony. Once you have seen each other and that initial rush of emotion has settled, you are already together in a quiet space. Instead of creating another separate moment later in the day, you can simply stay where you are and begin your vows.

It also means the first look does not have to become a staged moment created for photographs. The photographs are simply documenting something that has a purpose beyond photography: seeing each other, speaking privately and spending a little time together before the ceremony begins.

There can be practical benefits too. Once your private vows are finished, you are already together and ready, which can create an opportunity for a few relaxed couple portraits or even some of your wedding party photographs before the ceremony. That can give you more freedom later in the day, when your guests are waiting to celebrate with you.

But there is another side to this decision. If you have always imagined seeing each other for the first time as you walk down the aisle, keep that moment. Do not give it up because a first look seems better for the timeline or for the photographs.

The best choice is the one that feels most like you. Private vows can work beautifully with a first look, but they do not depend on one.

Finding the Right Kind of Privacy

Best Places for Private Vows at Markree Castle

One of the advantages of planning private vows at Markree Castle is the variety of locations available within the estate. You can choose something intimate and enclosed, something unmistakably grand and architectural, or step outside and let the gardens, woodland and River Unshin become part of the experience.

Having photographed many weddings here, I would never choose a location simply because it looks impressive in a photograph. Privacy, light, weather, guest movement and your wedding timeline all matter. The best location is the one where you can forget about everything else for a few minutes and concentrate on each other.

These are the places I would consider first.

The Markree Castle Chapel

The Chapel would be one of my first choices for a couple who wants their private vows to feel genuinely intimate. The stained glass, historic interior and enclosed setting give the moment a sense of occasion without needing anything else around you.

It works particularly well when private vows follow a first look. You can meet in the Chapel, experience that first reaction and then stay exactly where you are while the energy naturally becomes quieter and more personal.

After photographing this exact combination at a recent Markree Castle wedding, it is a location I would happily recommend when privacy and emotion are more important than having a large landscape around you.

The Grand Staircase

The Grand Staircase gives you something completely different. It is dramatic, elegant and immediately recognisable as part of an historic castle.

I have photographed first looks here before and it can work beautifully for couples who want a stronger sense of occasion. One person can wait while the other approaches, allowing the architecture itself to become part of the anticipation.

Because the staircase connects important areas of the castle, timing matters. For private vows I would always check how much movement there is around the space before deciding to use it.

The Grand Hall

The Grand Hall is another beautiful indoor option and has a completely different character from the Chapel. Its historic décor, fireplace and piano area give photographs a strong sense of being inside Markree Castle rather than in a generic wedding venue.

I would consider this space for couples who want something elegant but less ceremonial. It can also work well as an indoor alternative when the weather changes and an outdoor plan no longer makes sense.

As with the staircase, the important question is privacy. The Grand Hall is normally part of the life of the wedding day, so I would choose the timing carefully rather than simply deciding in advance that this must be the location.

The Billiard Room

The Billiard Room is one of my favourite Markree interiors when I want something atmospheric, relaxed and slightly less formal.

It has enough character to make the photographs unmistakably part of a castle wedding, but the feeling is very different from standing in the Chapel or on the Grand Staircase. For the right couple, that can make private vows feel more like a conversation than a ceremony.

It can also flow naturally into a few portraits afterwards, allowing us to use the time before the ceremony without turning it into a long photoshoot.

The Bridal Suite

The Bridal Suite offers a softer and more personal atmosphere. It can suit a couple who would rather have their first look or private vows feel like a quiet conversation than a formal wedding moment.

It can also make sense when it fits naturally with the preparations taking place inside the castle. Instead of moving across the estate simply to create a photograph, the moment can happen close to where part of the wedding story is already unfolding.

Access and privacy should always be confirmed for the particular wedding day before including the room in the final plan.

The Gatehouse

The Gatehouse gives you another side of Markree Castle. Instead of the grand interiors, it brings some of the history and architecture of the wider estate into the photographs.

For a first look or private moment, I would consider it when the wedding timeline allows us to move slightly away from the busiest areas around the main castle.

It is not a location I would force into the day simply for photographs. But when the timing, weather and privacy work together, it can give the moment a distinctive Markree setting.

The Castle Terrace

The Castle Terrace is one of the strongest options if you want to stay close to the castle while still being outside. It overlooks the manicured lawns and gardens and gives the moment a more open, romantic feeling.

It can be particularly beautiful when the light is soft and the terrace is quiet. The steps and surrounding architecture also give us several possibilities without needing to move the couple far once the moment begins.

Because this is an outdoor wedding space, I would always consider guest movement, weather and whatever else is planned around the terrace before choosing it for something private.

The Woodland

If privacy and nature are the priority, the woodland is one of the most interesting possibilities at Markree Castle. Moving beneath the trees immediately changes the atmosphere and creates a sense of separation from the activity around the castle.

It is a beautiful option for couples who want their private vows to feel quiet, natural and unhurried. The surrounding trees also give the photographs depth and atmosphere without needing to create anything artificially.

The practical consideration is distance and timing. I would make sure there is enough breathing room in the schedule so that walking to and from the woodland never turns a peaceful idea into a rush before the ceremony.

The Castle Gardens

The gardens give us far more flexibility. Depending on the season, light and where guests are gathering, we can find a quieter area while still keeping Markree Castle or the surrounding landscape as part of the setting.

This can work especially well for couples who want something romantic and recognisably Markree without the formality of an indoor space.

The exact location does not need to be decided months in advance. I would normally have an idea of where we could go, then look at the light, weather and movement around the castle on the wedding day before making the final call.

In Front of Markree Castle

Sometimes the castle itself deserves to be part of the story. A first look or a few quiet minutes together with Markree behind you can create photographs that immediately establish where the wedding took place.

This option is less about complete seclusion and more about combining the emotion of the moment with the scale and architecture of the venue.

I would only choose it for private vows when the area is genuinely quiet. If guests are arriving or moving around nearby, I would rather take you somewhere more private and return here later for portraits.

By the River Unshin with Markree Castle Behind You

For couples who are happy to walk a little further, the grounds beside the River Unshin offer one of the widest perspectives on the Markree estate.

This is a location I particularly like when there is enough time to slow everything down. You can step away from the immediate activity around the castle, have your first look or private moment near the river, and still keep the gardens and Markree Castle connected to the story.

It also gives me the possibility, when conditions and permissions allow, to photograph the scene from above. A wider aerial perspective can show not only the two of you, but the river, gardens and castle together, giving context to where this small private moment is actually happening.

This is exactly the kind of location where I would allow a little more time. The reward is not simply a different photograph. It is the feeling of having stepped away from the wedding for a few minutes before returning to everything that is waiting for you.

You do not need to choose your private vow location from a gallery months before the wedding. I would rather understand what kind of moment you want, keep two or three suitable options in mind and make the final decision when we can see the weather, light and rhythm of the day.

The location matters. But the reason you are standing there together matters much more.

More Time for the People You Invited

A First Look Can Give You More Time With Your Guests Later

One of the practical advantages of seeing each other before the ceremony is that we can use some of that time for photographs you would otherwise need to take later.

At the recent Markree Castle wedding I mentioned earlier, the first look flowed into private vows, followed by a short time for couple portraits. We were then able to photograph the bridal party before the ceremony as well.

That meant one important part of the photography was already finished before the guests ever saw the couple walk into the ceremony.

Afterwards, there was no need to gather the entire bridal party again and take the couple away for a long sequence of photographs. Instead, more of the time after the ceremony could remain exactly where it belongs: with the people they had invited to celebrate with them.

This is how I prefer to think about a first look from a photography perspective. It is not an opportunity to add another photoshoot to your wedding day. It is an opportunity to move some photographs to a quieter part of the timeline so that photography asks less of you later.

You also do not need to complete every couple portrait before the ceremony. A few photographs can happen after your private vows, while another short session can be saved for later when the light is beautiful. Breaking photography into small, natural pieces often feels far more relaxed than disappearing from your wedding for one long portrait session.

The goal is not to spend more of your wedding day taking photographs. The goal is to organise photography well enough that you can spend more of your wedding day actually living it.

Let the Moment Stay Private

Your Photographer Should Almost Disappear

Private vows are one of those moments when photography should never become the loudest thing in the room. Once you begin speaking to each other, you should not be thinking about where your photographer is standing, whether you need to look towards the camera or what the photographs might look like.

When I photograph moments like this, I work as quietly and unobtrusively as possible. I can photograph with a completely silent shutter, so there is no constant clicking from the camera while you are trying to listen to each other’s words.

That silence matters. A private vow exchange can become emotional very quickly, and even small distractions can change the atmosphere. My job is to document what happens without making you feel that you need to perform it for me.

This becomes even more important if you are having your vows recorded on video with sound. Your photographer and videographer should understand the plan beforehand and work together so that neither interrupts the moment, compromises the audio or repeatedly moves through the other’s frame.

For something this personal, good communication between your photography and video team matters just as much as the equipment they use.

Once your vows begin, forget about us. Do not look at the cameras and do not think about the photographs or the film. Look at each other. Take your time. Say what you came there to say.

We will take care of the rest.

Do Not Plan Every Minute

Build a Buffer Into Your Wedding Timeline

If you decide to have a first look and private vows before your ceremony, one of the most important things I would recommend is simple: do not fill every available minute with photographs.

A timeline might flow naturally from your first look into private vows, followed by a short couple session and your bridal party photographs. But I would deliberately plan for all of that to finish well before the ceremony begins.

That buffer is not wasted time. It is part of the plan.

It gives you a chance to step away from the cameras, have some water, use the bathroom, check your hair or makeup and simply allow the emotions of the previous hour to settle. It also gives you time to return to your room or another private space before guests begin gathering for the ceremony.

Just as importantly, a buffer protects the rest of your timeline. If preparations take slightly longer than expected, the first look begins a few minutes late or we need to change location because of the weather, the day does not immediately become stressful.

I would much rather finish your photographs early and give you twenty quiet minutes than photograph your bridal party until the last possible moment and send you rushing straight into your ceremony.

That little space in the timeline can completely change how the final minutes before your ceremony feel.

A Plan B Is Part of the Plan

What If It Rains at Markree Castle?

If you are getting married in Ireland, I would never build an important part of your wedding day around the assumption that the weather will cooperate.

The good news is that private vows and a first look do not depend on sunshine. Markree Castle gives us a number of beautiful indoor possibilities, so an outdoor plan can have an indoor alternative from the beginning.

The Chapel can create a quiet and intimate setting. The Grand Staircase gives us something more dramatic and architectural, while spaces such as the Grand Hall or Billiard Room can offer a completely different atmosphere inside the castle.

I would not promise one particular room months in advance without knowing what else is happening there on your wedding day. Instead, I prefer to have a few suitable options in mind and coordinate around the venue, your timeline and the conditions we actually have.

And rain does not necessarily mean staying indoors for the rest of the day. Irish weather can change quickly. We might have your first look and private vows inside, then step outside later for ten minutes when the rain eases or when beautiful light appears over the grounds.

This is another reason I prefer not to build a wedding timeline around one long photography session. When photographs are divided into smaller parts of the day, we can respond to the weather rather than fight against it.

You do not need perfect weather. You need a flexible plan.

Before You Finalise the Plan

10 Things to Know Before Planning Private Vows at Markree Castle

If private vows feel right for you, you do not need to overcomplicate them. A few thoughtful decisions beforehand can make the moment feel much more natural on the wedding day.